The details!

Justin was great to post below about our sweet baby boy so soon. If I would have had to do it then it wouldn't be getting done until now...two weeks later! But I thought I would make a record of how our adorable baby came into our family. *Sorry if this has too much detail but I wanted to make sure I recorded the details of delivering of our first baby*

Friday, June 17th (my due date), my parents were in town. We went (along with my sister and her kids) to the dinosaur museum at Thanksgiving point with the dual purpose of taking my mind off the fact it was my due date and to walk around ... a lot. It was fun seeing my niece and nephew be so intrigued by the exhibits there. Afterward that we went out to lunch then back to my apartment until Justin came home. We all went to the Pleasant Grove Strawberry Days fair that evening. That was fun! I love our small town and the unique feeling it has. Although I had some contractions that day/night, they weren't long-lasting. I was surprisingly okay with the fact I didn't go into labor on my due date.

Saturday was another story. Justin and I woke up early and walked to our garden behind our church (pretty good distance to walk). I think we did some general errands then my parents came down in the evening. We went out to dinner then came home. I was having more intense and consistent contractions Saturday afternoon into evening. I had my parents go back to my sister's so Justin and I could go to the hospital. This would be the time to confess that I was incredibly impatient. I wanted to have our baby so badly that I am sure I convinced myself I was in labor. Now convincing Justin that it was time to go to the hospital was not nearly as easy as convincing myself! I had an inkling that if we went we would be sent home but I just had to go. I was put in a triage room and monitored for an hour. The contractions were very consistent and intense. I went in dilated at a two and after half an hour I was maybe a 2 1/2. So the nurse had me walk around the hospital for another hour. Good thing it was late at night because I had to walk around in the lovely hospital gowns. Even though it was 10pm or so I still ran into someone I knew...what are the odds?! After walking around I was monitored again, no change. The nurse called my doctor that was on call and they suggested I just go home, after taking some pain killers, and rest through the night. Slightly bummed but not surprised, we did just that. I was able to sleep through the night and the contractions seemed to dissipate by morning.

Sunday, Father's day, June 19th. I had attended church the previous Sunday (all 3 hours) and was quite miserable sitting the whole time. I had thought it would be my last Sunday for a few weeks..but nope! I decided to attend Sacrament meeting, which started at 10:20am. It was drizzling that morning but the contractions were back in full force so even though Justin dropped me off at the church doors, I couldn't walk fast enough to avoid getting rained on. By the time I found the closest seat in the chapel, I was out of breath and in pain! A sister on the compassionate service committee has been checking up on my through the pregnancy and came up and said she was surprised to see me there. I responded with, "Yeah, I think I'm in labor now". lol. She was shocked and said if I needed it she had a blanket in the car. Yikes! I didn't intend on having our baby at church! We began timing my contractions once church started. This entailed me squirming around in my seat trying to get comfortable, with my arm around Justin's shoulder. Whenever a contraction would begin I would start digging my nails into his shoulder, harder and harder to match the pain I was feeling (poor Justin). He knew that was his cue and pressed start on his phone's stopwatch. The contractions were 3-5 minutes apart and very painful! A friend in the ward came by to check on me during the meeting and I just fell apart. She had a baby just a few months ago so the labor experience was fresh on her mind. I told her I was in so much pain but didn't know if I should go back to the hospital yet. She said I absolutely needed to go and right then. Justin saw me crying so we left and came back home. I sat on my yoga ball for a while through the contractions, Justin would rub my back, but no matter what the pain was nearly unbearable. This time I wasn't convinced it was time to go to the hospital but Justin really wanted to go. I finally conceded and we left at 12:30 for the hospital.

When we got to the hospital the admitting nurse for labor and delivery took me into a triage room and I got in one of the lovely gowns again. She said something shocking though... she told me they weren't going to hook me up to the monitors in that room, that she could tell I was in labor so they were going ahead and admitting me. She said she would have an epidural ready for me soon. I was totally surprised...she hadn't even checked me yet but is offering an epidural?! I guess between the look of pure torture on my face and the fact I was two days past due was enough to convince her that it was time. We were put in our delivery room and my family made their way down from South Jordan to keep up company. About an hour after being in the room the anesthesiologist (Brian, the best person in the world at the time) came in an administered the epidural. This was the first hurdle of the labor process that I knew I was going to face. I have this strange issue with my spine...just don't touch it and we can be best friends. If you touch it I get really bugged/grossed out/uncomfortable. So how will it be getting a huge needle in my spine, hunched over, so each vertebrae is sticking out big time...?! I still get queasy at the thought. But it really wasn't a bad process at all. I felt the pinch from needle that gave me the numbing medicine then I felt the pressure in my spine from the actual epidural but it wasn't painful from what I can remember. At first the numb sensation only was felt through my left leg. So they had my roll on my right side for gravity to help the medicine and soon enough the contractions were no longer being felt at all! It was a great epidural though, just enough so I didn't feel the pain but I could still move my toes and legs. I could also feel pressure when my legs were touched. My heart rate did decrease slightly after the epidural was given, which isn't all that uncommon. Caleb's heart rate likewise decreased down to the 90's (should be between 110-160 if I remember correctly). It wasn't a huge issue but they still had me put on an oxygen mask. Soon his heart rate was up in the target range again.

After the epidural they popped my water and monitored my progress. Soon after they gave me pitocin to induce labor. I was checked periodically throughout the rest of the afternoon into the evening. My family was all in the room visiting so the time when by quickly. By 8:30 when I was checked I was at 9 cm dilated and was told we would start pushing at 9:30. It was actually around 9:45 when I started pushing. (Justin and I hadn't attended any prenatal classes, we tried to but it was canceled, so we watched some videos. The videos didn't prepare us on how the actual delivery process would be, how to push etc, so we just did what the nurse told us to). Which was weird in of itself, all of a sudden the nurse said with your next contraction, hold your legs and bear down... I was taken off guard... is this it really? Is this the beginning of the pushing? It seemed too casual to be the start of such a monumental event. This started the second hurdle... and this hurdle I was absolutely not prepared for! I had no idea how intense the process would be. For the first hour or so (really I had no concept of time) Caleb's head was turned to the side, which made it nearly impossible to get where it needed to be. With one good push though his head was turned face down and he was in position to be born. Unfortunately it still took a long time after that. By the last 45 minutes (I'm guessing) I was completely worn out. I kept hearing positive comments from Justin and the nurse and expecting Caleb to be born any minute but push after push and no baby made it so I began losing hope. I really didn't think Caleb was going to make his appearance. The doctor finally came in, which meant things were really getting close, but it still took a while after that. All I can say is that when he finally was born I was completely relieved but also completely wiped out. I wished I had had more energy so I could have really soaked up my sweet baby and enjoyed my first time holding him. Since there meconium in my amniotic fluid, they whisked Caleb off to the baby bed and began sucking the meconium out of his lungs. He had a very healthy cry and was weighed in at 8 lb 2 oz and 19 inches long. He was officially born at 12:24 am...just shy of Father's Day. But it still makes for a good first Father's Day for Justin I think.

After delivery they took Caleb down to the nursery for his bath and a few tests and Justin went with him. I was wheeled down to our room on the mother & baby floor. I was so tired I hardly remember anything after Caleb was born. Monday was likewise a blur, after having gotten hardly any sleep and still being extremely fatigued. By Tuesday I was feeling better and really enjoying my time with Caleb. I felt an immediate bond with him and mothering instincts seemed pretty innate. I usually am not super comfortable handling newborns (they break easy right??) but with Caleb there wasn't any hesitancy, he was our baby and he is perfect!

The time in the hospital was nice but it was great getting home and being in a normal environment. I am so thankful my mom was out here...having the care of a newborn be in your hands solely is a scary thing at first. I was a worried mess the first night Caleb slept in his pack n' play by our bed.. is he breathing? Is he comfortable? What do I do if...? I'm relieved to say that I have gotten much more comfortable with the nighttime routine.

That's another thing about being a mom... I am surprised how quickly I can read Caleb. I know his hungry cry, his tired cry, his funny faces and movements and when something is okay or not. I know the sounds of his different breathing routines and all of this has made me a much less worried mom. He is eating great and he is definitely not having any problems with going potty (yesh, the diaper usage!), he sleeps great at night and has already developed a very consistent nighttime routine (eat at 9:30, 1:45, and 4:45). Unfortunately he doesn't do down very well after the 4:45 feeding so that makes for little sleep for both me and him.

At first recovery was hard, I could barely walk, even when I was home. Then it was the energy level, where in the world did all my energy go?! I'm thrilled to say the human body has an incredible bounce-back time frame and at 2 weeks I feel like myself (assuming I get my daily nap in :-) ). The hardest part right now is after his early morning feeding when I see the sun coming up and realize that my chances for more sleep are dwindling by each minute that passes. I almost need the nights to be longer so I have more opportunities to sleep. I think I average about 5 hours a night. But it really isn't that bad..again, assuming I get a nap at least every other day.

Justin has been so incredible with Caleb...and me and my emotions lol. Justin used to make frequent comments about kids/babies that made me a little nervous about how well he would be able to handle Caleb but I am seeing a completely different side of him. I try to make it so he doesn't get up much during the night with Caleb but if I do need him to get up he doesn't hesitate. He does a much better job at getting Caleb to sleep than I do. I love seeing Justin and Caleb together, especially since Caleb looks so much like Justin. It is so cute to see Caleb's eyes look up at me and know that they are Justin's-shaped eyes. I still can't believe that we made this beautiful little babe.

My overall thoughts at this time.. it is getting better and better everyday. Having a newborn and recovering at the same time was not easy. But having Caleb in our lives is the sweetest blessing.
He is such a sweet baby and so perfect...dirty diapers and all. I love watching him, either awake or asleep, he is so precious. I want to post more pictures soon, its crazy how much he has changed since birth. He gets cuter every day and more filled out too, he is up to 8 lb 8 oz and 20 1/2 inches long. (39th percentile for height and weight). I sure hope he has his dad's height and not mine! We love our sweet baby boy!

Announcing Caleb Blackham

I don't really blog, it's more of Amy's thing, but I thought I would put a few pictures of our new arrival, Caleb Blackham. He's doing great along with Amy, they are both such troopers. I don't know how Amy does it each day, a few days into this I feel SO exhausted and I have the easy part! We have been so blessed with such a sweet and healthy boy. Now starts the adventure of our little family. Amy has done such an amazing job already at being a great mom, you could say she's a natural! Here are a few pictures!

The countdown is on!

Lots to catch up on! The previous post was done nearly 10 weeks ago! In pregnancy time, that means a lot has changed. We'll go ahead and get pregnancy updates out of the way..

-Glucose test came back fine, or at least I assume so since I never heard anything about it or the results.
-I had my last four week apart appointment, then went through two two-week apart appointments, and now I'm on the weekly ones. Which I secretly love because I get out of work and I get to hear the baby's heartbeat!
-Weight gain is going on a staggering 35 (closer to 40) lbs I'm ashamed to admit. BUT I did read that women carrying boys tend to eat more than those carrying girls ... for the time being I'll take comfort in that fact. Our baby boy is just really growing and I can't seem to ever get full!
-Belly circumference is somewhere between 44-45 inches.
-As of this past Monday, the baby is measuring at 37 cm, so 37 weeks, which is a little ahead of schedule (yes baby, please come early!) And I'm not sure if this is too much to share but I'm 80% effaced and 1cm dilated. Time to start the power-waddle walks and stair climbing!
-We (me and baby) had two wonderful showers thrown in baby's honor. We are so grateful for the generosity of our friends and family! It has made the 'getting-ready-for-baby' process much easier.
-While my parents were out at the end of April we pretty much finished up the nursery. I had the valance still to make and the chair to buy but those things are done and the nursery is as ready as I think it will be. (pics below!)
-I have the rest of this week and next week left for work then it is time to really get ready for baby. If baby is on time I'll have two weeks between work and due date. We'll see how that time goes. Right now it sounds wonderful because waking up at 6:30am has become a nearly impossible task and trying to look semi-decent for work has seriously become an impossible task. (Imagine trying to fit a king-size down comforter in a pillow case and that is a good indication of how it is trying to fit into any clothes)

We are getting more and more excited every day to meet our little guy! Well you can look at these pictures and decide whether or not he qualifies as 'little'. :-)
(Sorry for the self-taken pictures! My photographer has school tonight :-) )
And our sweet one's humble abode:
(dark picture, sorry!)

Other happenings in our lives over the last ten weeks...

We celebrated our 3 year anniversary! It was on a Monday, we just had dinner at the house and exchanged cards. This weekend we are headed up to Park City for a night to have some R&R and shopping. We love our 3-day weekends!

Justin went to Brazil (Sao Paulo and Rio de Janeiro) for a staggering 10 days for his required MBA international trip. Thankfully my parents were out here and stayed at our place. I also had a couple days off work to spend with them. We we kind of able to chat through Skype every night... with long internet connection interruptions. I wish I could have gone with him, some of the beaches he went to look beautiful! But most of the time they spent touring businesses so it was definitely a trip more than it was a vacation. He got some good pictures but I'll let him blog about the trip. Justin finished up his 2nd spring block of classes and now is 3 weeks into his 7 wk long summer classes. Right after the baby is due he finishes up classes for the summer and we get to enjoy a school-free Justin until the beginning of September! Wahoo! Which works out great because I don't think our summer (weather-wise) is really going to begin until mid-June.

I think that is a good enough catch-up for now :-) Baby wants to lay down and watch some Design Inc. ...

Where is the time going??

Thankfully each week seems to be flying by. While my bulging belly is making life more difficult I am mainly just ready to meet our sweet little boy! Staying busy has been a good thing for us, granted Justin's busy life is borderline insane. I am ready for him to get a break from school...which will coincidentally come a week after our baby is due to arrive! Perfect timing!

Not much to update on other than I actually found the perfect bedding! There are a few different patterns and colors and it is a nice mix between modern and baby. Its by Lambs & Ivy, called Jumbo. I took the honorary belly picture in front of it so you can get a glimpse of it. I am very excited to get the rest of the nursery ready.

I am 28 weeks, soon to be 29! Ready to be out of the 20's. Had my 28 wk doctor appointment today, fundus and heartbeat are right on track. Successfully completed the glucose test, fingers crossed for healthy, normal results. I had pretty severe Braxton Hicks contractions at work on Friday. They were coming at 5 minutes apart! I went home early and laid down and they thankfully went away, whew! Since then they have been infrequent and inconsistent. I have one more appt 4 weeks away then two 2 week-apart appointments then on to the weekly appointments...yay!

PG Cupcakes & Other Birthday necessities

This past week I geared up for Justin's birthday by doing something I find to be quite fun...clothes shopping (for Justin, it isn't fun when I'm shopping for myself) and baking. Justin said he didn't have much to wear these days so one evening and two stores later I had quite the stockpile of clothes to help supplement his wardrobe. Granted, he doesn't find receiving clothes all that exciting :-(.

After the gifts were bought I started attacking a pretty hefty load of baking. First it was lemon cupcakes with strawberry cream cheese icing and chocolate ganache-filled cupcakes with vanilla icing (hence the title...PG Cupcakes.. :). Thanks Mom for the strawberry cream cheese icing and chocolate ganache cupcake recipes! Whenever I attempt domestic things (cooking, sewing, baking, etc) I go in with the best intentions but it often times turns into a scrambled mess. I was so pleasantly surprised and thankful that all the baking went so smoothly! (Thank goodness for that too, I'm sure I would have had a total meltdown had things gone awry)

The cupcakes were meant to be a surprise for Justin and our coworkers for celebrating his birthday on Friday (his birthday was on the 19th though). Thursday night, despite Justin's lack of curiosity, I caved and told him what they were for. He really doesn't like having any attention at work regarding his birthday... which explains why the decorations I put up in his office came down in a record 1 minute after he arrived to work Friday morning! Anyway I think the cupcakes were yummy and hopefully no one got sick from them!


In the midst of making/decorating the cupcakes I also made Justin's birthday cake layers. I made them Thursday night then wrapped them up well and froze them to be put together Saturday. (First time I have froze the layers in advance and it made things so much easier when leveling the layers and assembling them!). Friday night I made the cream cheese icing for the inside and top of the cake. Saturday I made the Chocolate Ecstasy icing for the sides of the cake. Put these all together and ta-da! You get a very yummy (but rich) Chocolate Birthday cake!



Whew last week was so intensely busy but great. We had a great Saturday celebrating Justin's birthday. Thanks for all the birthday cards and wishes that we sent his way. Another year older and another year wiser!

PS If anyone wants the recipes for the cupcakes, icing or cake just let me know! They are easy recipes I promise!

Baby bump!

I am 24 weeks along! Tomorrow I go in the for the dreaded (at least that is what my friends say about it) glucose test. Let's hope everything is right on track! Feeling the baby kick every day now, as is Justin, and anyone else who is brave enough to put their hand on my belly (haha). It's so wonderful having Justin help out with simple little things that I used to be able to do by myself... put my shoes and socks on...tie my shoes...zip up my boots..okay anything basically that has to do with me bending over requires help! And I have gotten more clumsy lately, so Justin is constantly bending down to pick something up it seems like! No sign of kidney stones (thank goodness), just having to deal with sore hips/loose ligaments. Happy to almost be down to the double digit countdown! Whew!

P.S. I am going crazy trying to find a suitable travel system, bedding, rocker, & diaper bag. Any suggestions...especially with the travel system and diaper bag?! I would really like to make my own bedding but who knows if I'll find the time to do that.

A rolling stone gathers..

Lots of pain! We got quite a surprise this week, granted not the good kind of surprise one would hope for! Tuesday morning Justin went to work early to play basketball and left his phone at home (he never does that!). I was working till 6pm that day so I was going to go in a little later than usual. I started getting ready for work when my lower abdominal area became very sore and uncomfortable. I thought I was having some type of cramps so I called over to my doctor's office when they opened (8:30am). I described the type of pain I was having, to which the front desk lady said "I'll have a nurse call you back and we can maybe get you in to see the doctor tomorrow." There was no way I was waiting! I told her with the type of pain I was in I couldn't wait another minute so they had me come in to see the doctor. The nurse thought I was having a bladder infection, which didn't seem far-fetched to me. After having a urine culture done, (and sorry for the graphic nature of this post).. they found blood in my urine.

By the time they put me in one of the patient rooms at the doctor's office I was in so much pain! It now had spread to my lower back and my upper right back. The doctor came in and explained what they thought it might be...kidney stones! So he sent me to the hospital (AF hospital) which is thankfully just next door. I had to wait for the nurse to get an ultrasound scheduled at the hospital so I sat in another nurse's chair behind the front desk, sobbing my eyes out! Side note: Definitely not my proudest moment looking back on it, but at the time I had zero self-awareness or any awareness for that matter. I called Justin at work and told him the situation and that he could meet me at the AF hospital. In the meantime, the sweetest nurse was helping me try and walk over to the hospital. We didn't get very far before my breathing had taken a turn for the worse so she drove us, in our highlander, over to the hospital. My sweetheart was waiting for me there, it was so wonderful to see him finally!

I'll skip over some of the more embarrassing details ... basically they did an ultrasound and found hydro (?)/inflammation on my right kidney. So the ultrasound tech said to go back to the doc's office. After driving back there and waiting for 15 minutes to see the doc, he said to go right back to AF hospital to Labor & Delivery. We got settled in a room on the labor & delivery floor (after waiting for what seemed like forever), the nurses came in with liquid relief. Another side note: I have always dreaded IVs, I hate the idea of a needle being in my hand and staying there. After the nurse tried putting the IV in my hand she announced that my veins were too small. I offered her my trustworthy-blood-drawing spot, the inside of my left elbow. (Again, I hate having blood drawn but with events in the past couple years I've gotten used to it-I just squinch my eyes and look away). That area worked and I was pumped with IV fluids and Morphin within no time. That took most of the edge off the pain but my right upper back was still hurting quite a bit. They gave me another drug (Tordal) which dilates the tubes within the urinary tract system and once that hit I was feeling pretty much back to normal. The latter drug was to help the stone pass more easily through the small confines it is in. After about 4 hours of resting in the hospital the doctor came in and said that I could go home. They were going to give me 4 different medications to help with infection and pain.

Kidney stones, really? I never had an inkling of what type of pain they create. I've heard that it is the closest thing to labor a person can feel but I don't think that ever hit home. Apparently the stones really hurt the most when they are on the move, but once they enter the bladder the worst pain is behind you. I am not sure if the stone has passed yet but thankfully the pain has. (Knock on wood!!). The nurses said that kidney stones can be super tiny, smaller than a grain (then why do they hurt so much?!) so sometimes it passed but you just can't see it. I sure hope that is what has happened, I definitely don't want a repeat of this week-especially when I'm pregnant!

The great things I learned from this experience:
-First of all, I have no desire now to try and have a natural birth! Bring on the epidural. I learned that I'm in enough pain it doesn't matter what needles go where, as long as they bring relief, I can stand the momentary discomfort.
-The AF Labor & Delivery floor is very nice! Our room was spacious and the nurses were super sweet and helpful.
-We got to hear our baby's heartbeat as they monitored him for about 30 minutes when I was on the initial doses of drugs. Little boy sounded so great they said, his heartbeat was wonderful! It was so comforting as I was lying there in pain that I could hear his sweet heartbeat in the background...wished they would have left that monitor on longer. He was pretty funny though, once they put the monitor on my belly he started kicking and punching right at it it seemed like. So amidst the constant heartbeat you would hear a loud thud from his karate kick. I like to think he was trying to cheer his mom up, and it sure did work!
-I really am grateful for modern day medicine. I can't stand being on medications constantly but through this experience they have been such a blessing!
-I have so many friends and family that are so loving and concerned! From the calls to texts about how I was doing, I was so grateful to have their support and love through it all. Their prayers too, as I'm sure that is why I'm feeling so great now!

Sorry for all the antics and drama of this post! You would think I was in a much worse situation by how I have been going on and on about it lol.

For a happier note!

Justin felt Baby Blackham kick last Sunday night for the first time. I grabbed Justin's hand (as I have countless times in the past) once I felt a strong kick. Every time in the past Justin had waited patiently but our baby was done with his exercising. But not last Sunday! Justin had looked away for a moment, but when he felt the kick his head jerked back at me and his eyes were big with surprise! It was so cute! Since then Baby (Carter?) has been kicking and punching and squirming around nonstop. They say you are supposed to feel 6-10 movements per hour... so sometimes randomly when I get a quiet moment I will feel for those movements. Within about 5 minutes I have felt probably twice that amount of movement. He makes it so I don't have to worry about him too much thank goodness! :-) I am so excited to meet this little guy!